Dating a man with a girlfriend or a man who´s in a committed relationship is high risk.
Ethics-wise, you know that you shouldn´t date someone with a girlfriend, or boyfriend, or anyone who´s in a committed relationship. It´s morally unacceptable.
However, even to people who seem to be on top of everything and who are morally smart, situations may come that would test their ability to choose what is right and what is wrong.
Even if never in their wildest dream did they think that they would end up as the third person, some people are tempted to follow their heart regardless. It could be a way to understand how it feels to be on the other side of the line, to realize that even relationship breakers have their own story.
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The thought that he´s only in a relationship but he´s not married can drive you to fight for your love, after all, what if you´re certainly the one who´s meant for him? But what if you´re not?
There are reasons why you should never date someone with a girlfriend.
1. You would have to stay in the shadow.
No matter what the situation is, whether the guy’s relationship to his partner is extremely weak and is close to breaking, or even if he´s already breaking up with her but she´s not accepting it, he could still not expose you to everyone.
He´s still in that circle of people who hope and pray that they would make up.
2. He may say something but he actually means something else.
Even if the guy says that he wants to break free from the relationship and just wants to be with you but that the girlfriend is using emotional blackmail such as suicide threats to make him stay, what he´s really wanting to say is that he can´t break free.
For whatever reason, the fact that she still has a hold on him means that he´s still into her, he´s not definite if he really wants to be with you and if it´s worth throwing everything out for you.
3. He meets up with you only during spare time.
If he dates or meets up with you only if his schedule allows him to or if the girlfriend isn´t around, that means that his so-called “trapped relationship” is still his priority.
He´s only using you to cover the loopholes in his current relationship but his world doesn´t revolve around you as much as he claims to.
4. You would have to live with the comparison.
He tells you that he´s falling in love with you because you have the qualities that he longs to in a partner that his current girlfriend doesn´t possess.
It could be the intellectual satisfaction or similarity of interests that drew him to you but there are also qualities that his partner possesses that you don’t.
At the end, the comparison goes vice-versa.
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5. You´d have to live with the guilt.
Even if you win him at the end, the guilt will always come back to you. You´ll be haunted by the thought that you built your happiness on someone else’s misery.
6. There´d always be mistrust.
Even if the guy ultimately chooses you over his partner, and he really sticks with you, you´ll have difficulty trusting him. There will always be issues of mistrust in your relationship. The thought of “what if he does it back to you?” will consume you.
7. It is a high-risk relationship
Psychologists and relationship experts confirm that a person who had history of cheating is a high-risk investment.
If he used cheating to build a relationship with you, he will use the same to escape from you once the honeymoon phase of your relationship is over.
8. There´d always be people who would label you as the “stealer”.
You got to be tough because there are always people who will hate you for being the third person who eventually won.
They will label you as the “stealer”. It requires hard-earned strength to face the world and not get affected by whatever people say about you. You may get inspirations from people who stood their ground, survived and are now happy such as Angelina Jolie and Julia Roberts.
Have you ever dated someone who was still in a serious relationship? What lessons did you learn?
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