How do you know you are desperate for love? When you focus all your energy on finding love and being in a relationship.
You are desperate for love when you can´t be happy on your own, or when you forget to get a life all in the name of pleasing a man.
“Desperation is an emotion women want to avoid like the plague. All smart, alluring women know this.” ~ Mimi Tanner.
Desperation sends the message “I’ve GOT to have this man. If I don’t, my life will be miserable.”
If you feel that way, you´re already miserable. Unfortunately.
[Tweet “But you never have to feel “desperate” for love.”]
Remember that desperation leads to being a needy girlfriend, which no man wants to be with. It makes you clingy, always readily available (which make you vulnerable to men who are in for the take), and lose your standards.
Desperation is a turn off. It will never make you look more attractive in his eyes. And I bet it will never make quality men want to marry you.
There’s a great deal of power in NOT being desperate in any area of life—men, friends, work, money, or challenging situations.
Make him commit and surrender his heart to you, learn how to be “the woman men adore and never want to leave”.
The moment you appear desperate, you lower your value. It works the same in applying for a job. If you tell your prospect employer that you badly need this job, you may get hired but you can´t negotiate for a higher salary.
You surrendered your negotiating power by giving away how much you wanted it.
If you are desperate for a man, you are unable to notice that you are being treated poorly. Why would you if you are willing to do EVERYTHING just to be in this relationship? Why would you if you are so afraid to walk away?
If you are desperate for love, you can´t command respect. You can´t command good treatment.
Remember the difference between command and demand. When you command it, you don´t ask for it. It is naturally given to you. But when you have to ask for it, there goes the problem.
Desperation is a state of mind. Your emotions don’t have to define who you are.
You never have to feel desperate if you can do two things:
1. Believe in yourself
Just because! You owe this to yourself.
God gave you a set of talents. You are capable of doing great things and improving your gifts so long as you rely on Him for strength. God has great plans for you. Included in His plans is to see you succeed in life.
Why do you have to doubt all the beautiful things God made, created and planned for you by not believing in yourself?
It´s true that there are times when your dating experiences may cause you to doubt yourself, especially when men pull away from you. But its during these times when you must toughen your belief in yourself.
If a dating relationship does not work out, focus on the lessons you can learn and use for the future. But don´t take that failed dating experience as a measuring stick of your worth as a person.
2. Don’t ever feel that you can’t live without ANY one person in the world.
Your own happiness cannot depend upon someone else.
People in your life may come and go. They may also change. You cannot control this.
Don´t look for happiness in relationships. You should be able to find happiness and contentment with yourself and your relationship with God.
“A great relationship between two devoted people is a beautiful thing. But in the strongest and most secure relationships, if for any reason their love ended, each individual would be able to go on and keep living—and possibly form another lasting relationship eventually, too.” ~ Mimi Tanner
It doesn´t matter if you´ve once or twice dealt with a broken heart. You have to keep on living and enjoying life, and you have to keep the hope of finding your Mr. Right any time soon.
Do you ever have to feel desperate? Not if you don’t want to.
Don’t be desperate. Be determined.
Be determined to believe that you are okay and that YOUR life will be okay, no matter what—no matter what anyone else thinks. It’s YOUR opinion about yourself that matters.
Be determined to believe that God will always be there for you. On days when you feel desperate for love, strengthen your relationship with Him and He will shower you with love and happiness no man can ever equate.
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